Thanks, Democrats

The Curmudgeon’s current member of the House of Representatives is Republican Tom MacArthur, a borderline tea party type who’s in his first term and, like most of his congressional colleagues, has nothing to show for the time he has spent in Washington. His seat should be ripe for a Democratic challenge.

But his potentially Democratic challengers? They’re mostly just ripe.

The first, Jim Keady, runs a bar, which is exactly the kind of background you want for someone who’s responsible for charting the direction of your country. Okay, so maybe he’s the common man, in touch with the needs of the people, right? Well, it might be difficult for him to be in touch with the needs of his prospective constituents for the very simple reason that Keady doesn’t even live in the district he seeks to represent.

Legal? Absolutely.

Ridiculous? Absolutely.

Keady’s biggest claim to fame, and in fact his proverbial 15 minutes of if, came during a Chris Christie town hall meeting a few years ago. Keady’s the guy Christie famously told to “Sit down and shut up.”

Christie may have been on to something there.

What’s Keady all about? That’s hard to say: his campaign web site doesn’t offer even a single thing he’d like to do if elected.

But he probably mixes a mean martini.

Keady’s opponent is Frederick LaVergne, a bank loan officer.

Who doesn’t love bankers?

So at least a banker would bring strong financial skills to Washington, right?

Well, maybe not: LaVergne, you see, filed for bankruptcy last month. His house is listed for sheriff’s sale.

So much for financial skills.

And while LaVergne is running as a Democrat, he ran for Congress in 2012 and again in 2014 as a member of something called the “Democratic Republican Party,” which supports a strict interpretation of the constitution and states’ rights.

Which means he sounds an awful lot like Ted Cruz.

Despite that ugly picture, LaVergne’s campaign web site suggests that he’s pretty far to the left and brags that “I am reviled by the establishment” but without explaining why.

On the other hand, it does offer the lyrics of a song he’s written.

Watch out, Orrin Hatch, there could be a new songwriter in town soon.

The Curmudgeon gleaned most of this information from a recent story in the Philadelphia Inquirer. The Inquirer reporter noted that she tried to talk to LaVergne about his candidacy.

The candidate declined to speak.

A candidate for public office who declines an interview with the biggest newspaper in the area in which he’s running for office? Seriously?

Maybe it’s a secret candidacy.

Considering the quality of the candidates, the resemblance between this picture of people voting and men taking care of business at urinals may be appropriate.

Considering the quality of the candidates, the resemblance between this picture of people voting and men taking care of business at urinals may be appropriate.

The Democratic National Committee knows stench when it smells it. It’s helping Keady, but only half-heartedly, with “guidance,” and without any apparent enthusiasm. You’d think the Democrats in Washington would be falling all over themselves for the opportunity to take over a seat from a one-term Republican congressman, but these candidates are so uninspiring that the national party isn’t even making trying to do so a priority.

So The Curmudgeon has to vote for one of these clowns today.

How depressing.

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